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Thursday, May 20, 2004

So apparently I was missing out on something my entire adult-drinking life. The concept evaded me for years. Until tonight. Strawberry vodka. And we're not talking vodka flavored somehow with strawberry likeness. We're talking strawberries soaked in vodka and then seemingly whirled in a blender together to form a super lecker beverage that would likely be served well in a smoothie. That's right. It would go well in a smoothie, but it's even super lecker alone. I really like the Monk sometimes. Tonight was one of those nights. Finally found out the name of the really cool waitress there, talked about random yet interesting topics and had a good night. Good nights haven't been rare lately. I can't help but feel lucky about that. Would be nice to curl up next to and thank someone for that, but that will wait. Doesn't change the sentiment.

I can remember ten years ago being up at the same time. Similar situation in that I had gotten home just before 2 in the morning. And laying in bed, staring at the ceiling before going to sleep. Of course, I won't be woken up at 4 am, and I won't be making a trip to Vallejo or a hospital at 5 am this year. But I'm still reminded. I still remember. And that can only be a good thing. The dream cameos are still happening. The memories are still there.

I looked through some old pictures today. Old family photos. Funny how everyone looks mostly the same, and nothing and everything is different. Everyone's grown up somehow, grown into how things are. Adapted and been adopted by different things or people in their life. How separate everyone is. I thought a bit earlier while I was looking at pictures about how different I am and how much I've changed in the past 10 years. Wonder what kind of impression I would leave now. And I know it doesn't serve me well to wonder, but I can't help but be curious and question if I'd make him proud if he was still here.

I think I would.

I hope I would.

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