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Thursday, April 29, 2004

I think my memory is improving. Or I was just hit with a stroke of genius this morning and considered that I should bring my laptop and old mobile to the office. For kicks. Still have to try to remember the xbox, but yeah...oh well. One day.

As a side note, Python books are not my friends. However, no one can claim I'm not stubborn. I'll persist. I'm determined. And then I can pester coding people to have a good laugh at my expense, but I'm used to that with my German skills so I might reserve the reviewing for ... uhh, no one I guess. I think one can only really ever handle copious amounts of laughter at their own expense over one certain topic. And by "one" I think I mean "me". Because I'm that special.

Headache is gone. Sore throat, gone. Sore neck, gone. Ear ache, still present, but only just barely. And I accomplished it all without medicamation. Yay me!

I came up with more sexy bits on a man's body, but I'll save that for later. Although, it's not really a short list as I've discovered recently. But nonetheless, the point is there's more.

It's really good to see people that you care about smile spontaneously. Makes for warm fuzzy feelings. Equally as cool are the little giggles or snickers for no apparent reason. Those are good, too.

So I've been considering an analogy that relates somehow (obscurely, yes) to myself in a number of ways. Although it's uncommon for me to consider children, sometimes their behavior and evolution as a human being make for a good analogy. And I'm a sucker for good analogies. So. *Please consider all of the following assumptions as complete and pure speculation, as I have no experience, understanding, practice, familiarity or desire to experience the producing of offspring or what experiences that might include or responsibility that that might entail.* Children naturally progress through certain phases in life. Successfully progressing through the phases of life lead to healthy (psychologically, physically and emotionally) people. I'd expound on Piaget, Erikson, Vygotsky.... yadda yadda. But, nah. Regardless... There's a phase where children are just learning how to walk. Parents are often very supportive in a number of ways, either holding the child on their feet (possible to do in a few ways), holding their hand for support, offering motivational comments and verbal praise, facial expressions and kindly gestures, physical praise in the form of applause or hugs or displays of affection, trust in the child through looks, gestures, words, etc. that the kid will walk eventually, sympathy and compassion when the child falters or falls.... I could go on and on, but I'll move on. And inevitably, the child learns to walk on their own. This achievement requires a number of things on the part of both the parent and the child. Since I've mostly covered the parental requirements, how bout a look at the child. They require determination to learn something, the will to walk, the capability to try, the willingness and sometimes eagerness to be independent in some way from their primary caretaker, the trust in themselves (somehow) or perhaps a better word is confidence, and the drive to do it. But they require the parent's support, understanding, help, trust, praise, sympathy and compassion, as well. Without at least a number of the requirements already listed, separation problems could occur (among, of course, other things).

Because this example isn't directly, but only psychologically, applicable to me at the moment in the way that there seems to have been some lacking in learning to walk at some point, I've been wondering just what I can do. It's not possible to go back and fix the problem in the same situation. It's likely possible, yet incredibly difficult, to fix the problem myself. But my biggest obstacle with this option is quite like my problem with coding. I never know where to start. I have a general idea of what I want as an end result, or sometimes even a really well understood idea of what I want as an end result. I just have this (seemingly) impenetrable solid wall that's disturbingly difficult to get around, climb over, dig under... I see the other side of the black box, but, sadly, that's it.

I hesitate to reference - if I hadn't just had a really long conversation with a friend I would have some clue as to what I was going to reference. As it stands, I have no idea. Therefore, I'll discontinue with the analysis and get out of here. Here's hoping Detroit wins in Calgary tonight. And Chelios is back from his mysterious injuries. Whatever that's all aboot.

Because it'll make me smile when I read this later....



As a side note, haven't woken up without a smile in a while. (I should have been a poet, no?) It's a nice feeling. Thanks, babe.

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